its weird that i've been thinking about you lately. Its really weird.I'm sure I'm fine.. it was hard to get over you.. i'm not going to deny it. as far as i know, when people have moved on with their lives.. its pointless to run memories in your head over and over again. Those memories that pained me a long time ago because things didn't work out the way i want it to be.. I know I'm really over you..as a matter of fact I dated someone whom I thought was greater than you but you're different.. i still get flashes of US once in a while.. what does it mean? I really don't know. Maybe I have loved P but then I'm wondering right now if I have loved you more. Or maybe I'm just running options in my head because I just got out from a really depressing scenario. Or maybe I did truly love you but I was in a denial for a long period of time. Its so sad to realize all these things now that you are gone. When I already made you feel that I closed the door for the both of us. I know in a way. you wanted us to be together.. that you wanted to take care of the little thing that we once had as long as you can. But I blew it off.. and I feel so fucking sad about it.
I miss the feeling of being inside your arms.. your laughters thats echoing inside your car when I'm acting cute.. the way you want me to hold you when you drive me home.. the feeling of holding your hand in public as if we wanted the whole world to know that we are together... the conversations that we share.. your worried face when you can't drive me home.. the cheery eyes that you throw me when I buy you caramel sundaes... the sound of your voice when you call me pretty.. the way you stroke my hair when I'm talking.. the act that you pull when singing ala John Mayer inside your car.. the way you take care of me but so afraid to show it.. the goodbye kisses that we share when I'm in front of my gate..your cute face when you're mad at me..the sad face that you failed to hide when I said goodbye.. the way we look at each other when you ask me a question, I answered with sarcasm and you seemed lost looking into my eyes.. the way we sneak around to spend time together in your car during working hours..the serious face you always pull when i'm sick and is so stubborn to go to the clinic.. the way you react when i'm jealous..
hell, b! you're making my heart melt.. right about now.
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