dazed and confused.

Just woke up. My head feels like blowing up. This is what I hate when I sleep early.. well, who's to blame? I'm so stressed at work that when I get home I usually don't have time to even wash my face. Sooner or later there will be a number of pus in my cheeks.. and I'll sure freak out. But that's another story. My greatest worry this week will be... hmmm.. Valentine's day. Boy, its hard to celebrate it when you're single especially when you have boys clinging on you.. I feel so damn guilty. I mean whats to celebrate during Valentine's anyways? Its just one hell of relationship propaganda. You know what? I don't even want to talk about it.

I'll be seeing Kim again. And I can feel the pressure. She will ask questions... about me. About my lovelife. And as early as now, I'm thinking on how to dodge it. I'm 100% sure that she will snoop around Jay and me.. and I don't even want to talk about it because it might rekindle something really weird.

I had a hard time calming Jay's feelings towards a friend of mine last night. He was so mad.. he doesn't want to hang around them anymore. Shit. He doesn't want me to go out with them as well.. but i made it clear that I can take care of myself.. but he refused to believe that. I'd prolly get pissed if the same thing happened to my friend but then again I am very understanding. I know Jay cares for me a lot and he always wants the good things for me. I feel the same way for him. But then again, he is over reacting. I know he is very conservative and he gets offended whenever I wear revealing clothes that sometimes I wonder if its more than that.. but knowing a person for around 3 years and being with him through hard and the high times makes me think that his intentions are pure and simple : He loves me as his friend. He cares for me like a sister. And I really appreciate that. I wouldn't risk our friendship. Thats really stupid. And so I'm confused again. Haahahahha. No way. I'm just a bit lonely and bored.. I promised myself.. I wouldn't put him again in that situation. Not in a thousand years.

Later.